Scribit Veritas

Protecting the Child, Preserving the Family, and Honoring Life

Welcome to the Blog page of the American College of Pediatricians.  Each issue of the Blog is intended to assist parents, encourage children, and enrich the family.  Read our most recent issue below, and scroll to the bottom of this page to read earlier issues.

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Can Money Buy You Happiness?

money buy happinessIt’s a big debate that will usually bring a moment of silence when the question is asked, “Can money buy happiness?” Well, the truth is, that it can. But what are we spending our money on that is giving us this happiness? I came across an article that said when you buy a new object, it gives you only temporary happiness because you adapt to it after a certain period of time. What if instead of buying an object, you were to buy an experience? It will still give you happiness but can also create a memory?

My husband and I have recently discussed giving less material objects for presents and instead giving our children more experiences that we can do as a family. It might take a few years to get used to for our kids, but we are going to give it a try. If we take more trips together, spend more time together, those are the things our kids are going to remember. They are probably going to forget which book they got at which holiday and why they wanted that doll so badly. They won’t ever forget the vacations we take them on and the things we give them opportunities to experience.

What are your thoughts about this?

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Pajama Party!!

pajama party

Friday night at our house is Pajama Party Night! This is the one night a week that my kids get to stay up late, watch a bunch of movies, and have a few treats that we don’t typically consume during the week. We started doing this when my kids were old enough and started school. We wanted something fun for them to do at home to get the weekend started and just relax after a week of school and homework. Eventually this became something they wanted to invite a friend to. Some years, their birthday party was even a Pajama Party. They absolutely look forward to Friday night every week!

While our kids do enjoy watching movies and eating treats, they love it even more when my husband and I join in on the fun with them. Life can get hectic for parents and sometimes it is nice to have something that takes the attention of the kids without the parents having to be involved. My kids sure get excited when my husband and I join them though. What do you like to do with your kids? Are you spending enough time with them? I encourage you to put down the phone, turn off the computer, and give your family your undivided attention. Make some good memories!

 

 

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Overprotective

overprotectiveIt is natural to want to protect your children from anything negative in this world. It can be taken too far though. Not only will you prevent your child from experiencing what could be important and life-changing experiences, you can create a fear in them that whatever your fear is should be their own fear as well. For example, because I have a fear of heights, I naturally will keep my children away from high places because it is scary for me, personally. All this is doing is telling my children that they should be afraid of heights. Does that make sense?

What can we do about this? It is natural for everyone of all ages to have fears. Is it right to instill our fears into our children though? Or should we let them experience life and find their fears on their own? It can be so hard to let go of our children and let them see the world through their own eyes. How do we do it?

Let Go……

Let go and allow your children to fall, make mistakes, experience rejection, feel jealousy and suffer defeat.

Let go and watch them grow in confidence, skill, responsibility and emotional intelligence as they learn from all life has to offer them.

Let go of your attachment to be an overprotective parent and find constructive ways to release yourself from your fears before you give them to your children. Get professional help if your fearfulness is debilitating.”

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The Family in Society

happy familyWilliam Bennett wrote an article for the New York Times, entitled “Stronger Families, Stronger Societies”. In it, he discusses that the way to make society function properly is to make the family unit stronger. It is the base unit of any community and is what society revolves around. As a result, we find that when society begins to suffer, we see that the family is suffering even more. The two are directly linked. People talk politically about making the world a better place to live but are they recognizing the need to make life better for the family? As we observe the digression, we can only wonder what more can be done. I think that it needs to start in our very own family. As parents, and future parents, we have the power to make a difference in this world by making a difference in our homes. Take the time to teach your family about how important they are, ways that they can be successful, and how to pass that on to future generations. If we each took the time to take care of our own family, don’t you think the world would be a better place? Imagine it! Everyone is happier, people are kinder, marriages are stronger and families are better. All of these results just because we love and take care of our own family.

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Marriage Isn’t Perfect

marriageMarriage isn’t perfect. It just isn’t. We all go into it hoping it will be and somehow feel let down when we realize it isn’t. People aren’t perfect and therefore marriage never will be. We all have our struggles as individuals and as families. When we struggle, if we show our children that we can work through our problems and still love each other, we will teach them to not expect a perfect marriage. This unfounded belief that marriage will be free of any problems or conflicts is busted at the first disagreement. Then without effort to fix it, divorce happens instead. For a family to be as successful as possible, both parents are needed in a home. That won’t happen unless two people can work through a problem and push through to see the rainbow that comes after a rainstorm. Yet, whenever we see a rainbow, don’t we forget about the storm that just passed? We find ourselves grateful for the rain because it was the reason we are given the moment of clarity and beauty we find ourselves in after a trial has passed. No, marriage is not perfect. But it is worth fighting for to see the rainbow at the end of each storm.

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Be Happy!

be happyBeing a happy person has got to be one of the most desired qualities that a person can have, wouldn’t you agree? Some people just naturally seem to be happier and more positive than others. If it is so desirable, don’t we want our kids to learn how to be more optimistic? There was a list I saw that gave parents 51 ways to help teach their children to be happier individuals. After reading through each item, I concluded that it comes down to our example of being happy and optimistic and also being involved in their life. This doesn’t mean that simply smiling when you see them once a day is sufficient, but really getting involved and doing things with them to show positivity and unconditional love. Does this take a little bit of effort on our part? Sure does! Will it require us to be happy and optimistic in the first place? You bet! What we don’t realize though is that doing this for our kids will also help us live a higher quality life in return. It’s a win-win situation.

Take a moment, gather your kids around you and GET HAPPY!

 

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“P” for Pedophile

pedophile-word-cloud-concept

Driving in this morning I began to wonder. Why isn’t the movement of LGBT not the PLGBT movement: “P” for pedophile?

When I look at the origins of the transgender movement I find John Money and Harry Benjamin, both bisexuals, who failed to condemn pedophiles, and freely associated with them.

When I look at the data from Donald Paul Sullins taken from the Add Health Survey, I see a 7 fold increase in child sexual abuse when lesbian couples get married, compared to when they stayed unmarried. Incest is a form of pedophilia.

When I look at sexual minorities studies examining for a history of childhood sexual abuse, I see rates as high as 75%. They were victims of pedophilia. Some of them do engage in pedophilia. In addition, we know that victims of child sexual abuse engage in same sex behavior at higher rates, averaging 4x, but up to 7x higher than their non-victimized peers, depending on the study.

When I look at criminology data on adult or juvenile sex offenders, I see many of them were childhood victims of pedophilia or incest. Juvenile offenders that sexual abuse minors preferentially select the sex of the victim to be the same as the one that sexually victimized them.

When I look at sex education in schools, I see Alfred C. Kinsey, and his colleagues, and I see pansexuality and an embracing of pedophilia, along with bestiality.

Child pornography exploits children. It is the worst sort of exploitation in the age of the internet and storage of images. If pedophilia becomes the new norm, the explosion of exploitation will be unparalleled.

In one sense, it could be argued that the LGBT movement is only tangentially associated with pedophilia. I see that argument, but the pushers of the movement, the activists, I think have pedophilia intrinsically woven into their agenda. It is they who need to be spoken to and against.

Click here for references to support this commentary.

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Take the Time to Prepare!

planning a familyPlanning to have a family and be a parent is a decision, after marriage, that a husband and wife make together. I hear all of the time about how you should be prepared before you get a pet because it can be a big responsibility. This rings true for kids as well. They aren’t something you can send back if you think it isn’t going to work out. Having children is a serious thing and being a parent is an amazing thing! It is hard though. But if you take the time to know what will happen physically and emotionally, what it will require of you financially, as well as being sure your relationship with your spouse is ready for it, it can be such an amazing thing to happen in your life.

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Grandparents

grandparents

For most people, memories of their childhood include time spent with grandparents. These elderly individuals all hold a special place in our heart, places that cannot be filled by anyone else. As we talk about and encourage traditional family values on this blog, this includes getting to know our extended family members. The experiences that our grandparents have had in their lifetime are sometimes things we will never experience ourselves. The stories they can tell, the books they can read, and the lessons they impart are timeless and inspirational.

In my family, I have been blessed to live just 8 houses away from my parents for the past few years. My 5 kids are often found at grandma and grandpa’s house when they claim to want to run away. They enjoy riding bikes down the road (which is just far enough for them to feel like big kids and be able to go further than just our front sidewalk and driveway). Grandparents may not always be a part of our children’s lives, but isn’t life so much sweeter when they are?

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Aren’t They a Little Young for That?

children-and-technologyI’m pretty sure that kids are now born with the knowledge of how to work electronic devices. It seems like the more kids I have, the faster they catch on to which button to push and how to use a touch screen. Just because they know how to use one, does that mean they should be allowed to? I can see the benefit of being able to send a cell phone with your child when they go out with friends just in case of an emergency. It seems though the age of children acquiring cell phones is lowering to where even kindergarteners and first graders are toting one around. Doesn’t this seem too young and a bit….unnecessary? When our children get attached to these devices so young, they miss out on opportunities to converse with others. This is necessary for young and developing minds. We don’t want them to isolate themselves as they play various games and spend time watching YouTube videos. Isolation can actually lead to depression and anxiety because children aren’t learning the necessary coping skills of how to deal with the life around them. It is all fun and games, to be sure. It’s a great source for entertainment, no doubt. But too much of a good thing…can be bad. Don’t you agree?

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